Friday, August 26, 2011

Am I a masochist too?

Recently I started working out with a personal trainer. I thought I was a Sadist and got off on inflicting pain to people. Not everyone mind you, just the slaves who crave some pain. But then again, I can be a sadistic bastard and just fuck with your mind and not actually inflict any pain. I do have SOME masochist’s tendencies in me. For example, I broke my crop on my own leg.

Here is the scene. I have a submissive, bent over a wooden sawhorse. Knees, ankles, elbows and wrists tied to the legs of the saw horse. Ass high in the air. Ball gag in her mouth. I am walking around her teasing her skin with a feather. Swatting her with the crop every so often. Nice little crop prints all over her body. As I walk around I am slapping the side of my calf with the crop at a rapid fire pace. When all of a sudden, the crop swings lighter in my hand and the top of the crop is replaced with the tail of a whip. Looking at the crop, I realize I have just broken the shaft in half and the other end of it has flown some 6-8 feet away from me. What do I do? Reach for another? Grab my wood paddle or spoon? No. I scream out fuck and say I just broke my favorite crop. A moment passes by and the next thing I hear is what I think is a giggle. Looking at said subbie bound to the wooden sawhorse, I see she is shaking. Not shaking from fear, but shaking because she is laughing uncontrollably. Removing the ball gag, I ask her what is so fucking funny. She replies that she has never had a Dom break a crop, especially on himself. One hard slap on her ass fixed that laugh real quick. But quickly she replies, well, if that’s what it takes to get a good ass slap, I will laugh AT you more often. Followed by a giggle. Next followed by my knife. My knife cutting the ropes and setting her free. She pouts. Scene goes on for more, but I wont go into more details yet.

Back to the masochists in me. So, like I said, I have been seeing a personal trainer. And after the first hour long session, I now realize he is one sadistic bastard. The fucker has doing things and working out muscles that I didn’t know existed in the human body. And I got an A in anatomy and physiology in college. Right now, my arms are so sore, I couldn’t pick up a length of rope and tie that submissive to the sawhorse if my life depended on it. My thighs are still burning from the squats on the rack on TUESDAY!!!! 3 days ago. Hell, I bet my cock and balls are probably sore. Just haven’t had to do anything with them to find out if they are able to move. But you know what. DAMN IT FEELS GOOD. And to beat it all, I scheduled appointments 3 weeks out with this guy. Yes, I am masochists as well as Sadists. Just don’t ask me to spank, flog, or even tie you up right now because I just can’t.

Are there any good subbies out there willing to give me a weekend long massage?


I will inflict the pain, but I will kiss away the tears.
(Although right now, the only pain is in MY muscles, will you kiss them for me?)

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Did you fart? Part 2.

This morning I was browsing another blog. This blog belongs to someone who has read mine. Hers is quite interesting, erotic and funny. Funny because I am cruising the title section of her blogs and my eyes freeze in their gaze when I see one titled Fart. Instantly I click on it and before I am half way through it, I am laughing my ass off. So much so, I had to stop reading and wipe the tears from my eyes. Absolutely hilarious to read her little story about the time she farted on her Dom.

So I got to thinking after reading this. Some of the comments she received along with what was happening to her brought up a point. Sometimes you are going to fart while engaged in a sexual activity. You know, fucking? Either a cock or a dildo or even another persons fist inside you can cause air to become trapped, this creating a passing of said air that was trapped between your pussy or ass wall and the object that is being inserted and removed repeatedly in an in and out motion. Get the picture? Most men love pussy farts. Makes them feel empowered when that can cause a woman’s pussy to fart.

I remember being a kid and my step dad laughing so hard from farts I thought he was going to die from lack of oxygen. We would go fishing, I could cut one in the boat and he would lose it. Once we were watching SNL and they did a skit with this doctor who had bottled farts. Holy fuck I had never laughed so hard in my life. I don’t remember if I was laughing at the skit or at him for the way he was laughing. Great memory.

There is a website called You should check it out. I have used it before here at the office and made a few people think I have broke wind. Plus there are some awesome videos on there too. Check out the dinosaur fart.

Fart is natures way of releasing built of pressure. Either pressure for all those beans you ate, to the pressure of the Dom’s cock fucking your cunt. A fart is a fart either from your pussy or ass. LOL. Unless of course you do a crop dusting then all bets are off.


I will inflict the pain, but I will kiss away the tears. Unless of course its tears of laughter from farting in my face, in which case you just have a plain ole ass whipping coming.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Be careful of who you challenge.

Recently I went out to a local club and was hanging with some friends. It’s always great going out with friends. Mingling, drinking beer, enjoying laughs and hitting on each others wives. the last time we all went out, we were having a grand ole time. Met a new couple, a nice young couple. Oh how I like nice young couples. Especially when the conversation turns towards BDSM. Turns out he is somewhat new to the lifestyle. I admit, chatting with him some, he has what it takes. The young lady who was with him that night might be a different story.

One thing I find interesting in a lot of people is their need to challenge one another. “I’m going to kick your ass!!” “I can beat you in a game.” “No one spanks harder than so and so.” This one I like. Especially when at the club and hearing people say that when they find out I like to spank some ass. At first people would laugh, roll their eyes and give me that “yea yea’s”. I think they now know I back up with I say. More often than not, people do not know what they are getting themselves into when they meet me and attempt to challenge me.

Back to this particular young girl new to the lifestyle. She quickly received some education from me about humility and keeping her mouth shut. The conversation was going along the lines of what do you like, exchanging laughs, joking, telling stories etc when she decided to open her mouth and tell me she has no limits. “Honey, everyone had limits.” She assured me, that “I have no limits.” Ok, that caused me to roll MY eyes. The other lady that was with me, a Domme, she put her hand on my arm, because she knew what was coming next.

I chuckled; evil laughed and kept my mouth shut. Yes, I kept my mouth shut. The best things come to those who wait little one. We chatted more about this and that. Things to do to her nipples, ways to bind her wrists etc. The four of us engaging in friendly conversation and banter back and forth when the boyfriend/Dom stated he wanted to see his girl on the stage and dancing. She insisted she was not going to dance on stage, would not do it period. End of discussion. Pausing mid smile, I cocked an eyebrow and said, “Oh really?” My Domme friend tried to step between us and push me away because no telling what was going to happen next.

I made the comment, “I thought you said no limits?” She responded with that’s right or something along those lines. Are you sure? Positive. Ok, so just to make sure I am clear, you have said you have no limits… correct? And again the answer was yes Sir, no limits. Now that giant evil grin flashed across my face. I turned to the boyfriend and asked his permission to test this theory of no limits. He nodded and said sure. I said, if you have no limits, then why are you refusing to get on stage. Nothing. So you are still standing on your words of “I have no limits.”? Yes Sir I am.

Let’s just say she never made it to the stage, she ended up in a puddle on the floor sobbing because her stubbornness got her in trouble. I heard from him the other day. He tells me things are a lot better between them. Even growing. He is having a lot of fun play time with her and she is a very obedient little subbie.

Be careful of who and when you challenge someone. You just might bite off more than you can chew. I am not one to really challenge someone. But I will do my best to excite you and push you to be better, bolder, work harder, be more attentive etc. I am sure there is someone out there who can flip me in a challenge, but I have yet to come across that person. But if I do, all I can say is, clear the city, there is going to be a throw down that night.

Oh, and by the way. Is there anyone who wants to challenge me? WEG.


I will inflict the pain, but I will kiss away the tears.